(For the girl I lit the candles for)

I’ve generally felt a calling to study power and be connected to it.  Not so much the pursuit, not ambitious or driven enough.  Power for me was not for its own sake or to lord it over others.  I wanted it to be more about not being powerless, legitimacy as an immigrant and Asian in this society, the ability to change things, and protect others.

I think I had real power at various stages.  Mine was always a combination of position, knowledge, skills, character, and will.  At some key moments, I knew I was created for that specific point in time.  The stars aligned and I was the right person for certain events.  They also say that power reveals who you are, I hope I did well on this front.

But I’ve always known not to grasp on to it.  While power isn’t an illusion, I refuse to worship or be controlled by it.  Power is seductive and more powerful than any drug. 

And I think that approach ended up protecting and saving my soul.