(For the girl I lit the candles for)

I learned quite a bit about Jesuit teachings in Boston.  One of my colleagues is a Jesuit priest who served in San Quentin Prison, ministering to death row prisoners.  The Jesuits have rigorous training.  One of their most significant techniques, if not the most, is the discernment of spirits.

It involves prayer, meditation, etc. to discern the path forward.  If someone is going down a bad path, the evil spirits will encourage it and you will feel positively. The good spirits will seem discordant.  Conversely, the opposite for someone going down a good path.

With you, I do feel that this is a good path – at least in the writing, hoping, and praying.  It is powerful.  In this dark period, ever since deciding to write you, my strength has returned.  The same strength that allowed me to endure this lonely, beautiful journey. To bite my tongue, control my fears, stand alone, dream. 

The strength that was nearly wiped out and missing for a long time.

And yes, sometimes I think this is crazy.  Until I get reminded that it isn’t.  In the words of Simon and Garfunkel, after changes upon changes, we are more or less the same.

There’s a Taoist saying – “Loving someone gives you strength, being loved by someone gives you courage.”

I think that’s spot on.